Never even seen your face.

A prayer for Noah

I have never even seen your face

but today I pray for peace and grace

I pray that hope and love would abound

That you would rest safe and sound

That you won't feel so all alone

That His heart would be your home

That you would know your in our dreams

And that it won't always be as it seems

His ways are just and true

His love is just for you

No matter what's been done

You will always be the one

The one He came to know

The one He came to claim

The one He died to love

The one He lives to rename

I have never seen your face

Or held you in my arms

But He's the one who formed you well

And will deliver you from harm

Noah is a three and half year old little boy from Ethiopia who was recently adopted in the past 6 months. As many of you know my parents have adopted 3 girls almost two years ago from Ethiopia and so because of this my mother was approached by a friend of hers who is an attachment therapist. She asked my mom if she would be willing to have Noah come over for visits and meet my three Ethiopian sisters because that might be comforting for him. The attachment therapist had evaluated little Noah and felt that he was very appropriate and sweet but quiet. She felt concerned for him and wanted to help him adjust.

My mom immediately called me and said "now Liesl, I am not going to tell you what to do but please just pray about it. There is a little boy named Noah and...." Well of course my heart was immediately burdened for this little boy and I told my husband casually over dinner just to see what he would say. My husband is my perfect half in every way... I would be the one who would say YES! all the time and then get in over my head... at least when it comes to kids. Which isn't always a bad thing mind you but he is a wait and lets pray and see what is on the Lord's heart type of guy which is exactly what I need! So I already knew what he would say, which he did, but he also said "hmmmm, I really want to meet him." Now, you have to understand my husband loves kids but he wants the perfect will of God for our family and doesn't want to do things just because it's seems like it's a good idea. I so appreciate that. In everything I do I want it to be done within the will of God for my life and for our family. We prayed for a week or so and Francisco (my hubby in case you didn't know his real name) said one night... "well if anything happens we will take him." I love that man.

Any way, to shorten things up.... we all started praying for Noah and had set up a day to meet him. The day came, but Noah never showed up. We still prayed. My mom, husband, and I all agreed that there was just something about Noah and somewhere in our minds thought maybe God was going to make him a part of our family somehow. Then again, we were able to set up another play date. Thursday morning on my mom calls me and all she says is "he's in the hospital, and that is all I know!" I knew exactly who she meant and felt as if I had been punched in the gut. She quickly hung up to see if maybe she could find out why, where, since when?? We didn't even know at this point why he was in the hospital or what had happened but we both knew that regardless we were to pray. For the sake of the people involved I cannot go into details however as of June 29th, 2010 little Noah has been in critical condition in the PICU (pediatric intensive care unit) due to injuries resulting from shaken baby syndrome. We have not been given much information as there is to be an investigation. Also, we have not been allowed to visit because of the extent of his brain injuries and the doctors not wanting him to become over stimulated. We do know that he is alive and occasionally alert but nothing more. PLEASE continue to pray for Noah that he would make a full recovery! Shaken babies usually have a very poor prognoses and there quality of life is greatly diminished. Possible outcomes range from seizure disorder, mental retardation (mild or severe), life altering disabilities, paralysis, blindness, deafness, or even being in a completely vegetative state.

We do not know what the outcome for little Noah will be in regards to his health or even in regards to his living situations. We hope to be able to make him a part of our family somehow if at all possible. Thank you for reading and for joining in praying for Noah.

Uterus for occupancy... utilities included.

Our little one is almost 15 months old and boy are we ready for another one! My husband said to me the other day, "We just make em so cute, why don't we just have a bunch!" Golly, now I know why I love that guy! It is true though, despite me being a partial momma, we did make a pretty cute little munchie the first time around. The hard part is in the waiting..... and then remembering that God's timing is always perfect!

So, Jesus thank you so much for our beautiful little girl. If your ready so are we! Please give us another little blessing soon and many more to come! Amen

Because who wouldn't want another one this cute!!

I love my momma!!

I am sure you have heard of Christmas in July.... well this is Mother's Day in July, sort of. I figure I can't have a mommy blog and not talk about my own mother!!!! Mostly just an excuse to brag on my mommy cause she deserves it! Just being a mom has got me thinking a lot about my own mom. All the nights I spend up with my little girl. All the alone moments, all the silly moments and uh-oh moments, and then there are the so sweet moments where I am just undone by how much I love my little person I don't even know how to handle myself. Then I think about how my mom must have felt/feel about me. Did she love me like I love my daughter? Does she still worry about me even though I am all grown up. How many times can I count as a child that she sacrificed so that I could do something or have something. How many nights did she sit by my bed and play with my hair or scratch my back so that I could fall asleep. How often she drove me to and from events spending hours upon hours just taking me wherever I needed to go as often as I needed to go there. Besides all those little things that mommies do that no one ever notices she taught me how to love Jesus. She taught me how to be the kind of friend a friend would want to have. She taught me how to take care of others and love my siblings. She was my greatest advocate! Constantly pointing me in the right direction. She is wonderful of course but mostly I just want her to know that maybe I didn't notice or appreciate all the wonderful things you did for me then but I am remembering them now. Thank you thank you! From the bottom of my heart. For always loving me no matter what. Yes, of course I know... it's your job but thank you for doing it so well! You are one of my best friends and greatest inspirations. Love you so very much! xoxooxoxo

Cloth Diapers.... oh boy!

So today I am sitting in the car with one of my younger sisters and she says to me "So, I hear your obsessed with cloth diapers?" I sheepishly smiled... "ya, it's true". :) What can I say, I am hooked. Not sure it's completely healthy but it could be worse. I didn't realize how excited I was about the whole thing until the other day I ran up stairs with my very own homemade fitted CD in hands and was all excited to show my husband. He just laughed. " I have never seen you like this before." "I think it's kind of cute."

Now I have only been using CD for about 4 four months and just recently started using them overnight. I had bought about 300 disposable diapers on sale in March and so we have been using those at night. I have about 25 hidden in her closet for a road trip we are about to go on in August because yes I am just not that brave yet but as of yesterday all of my disposables are official gone... dum da dum. I honestly can say I was really intimidated by the thought of it initially and even a little weirded out but the more I thought about it the more natural it seemed. I didn't even realize there were so many options!!! Oh my! It's amazing how many options there are out there and all things that go with CD. It's like a whole new world.

The reason I even entertained the idea was the concept of saving money. I only have one child now and was easily spending $40.00 dollars a month on diapers alone. That doesn't include wipes or the newborn stage when I would go through boxes a week!! Not to mention laundry from the outfit changes from her having massive explosions. So I brought it up to my husband who looked at me like I had five eyes. Then I calculated how much we spent each year on diapers (http://www.diaperpin.com/calculator/calculator.asp) and what we would save if we switched. I then compared that to how many kids we are considering having which is definitely more than 1 or 2 and we thought about it for a few minutes and he gave me the green light. I will say that I didn't have a clue what I was getting myself into.

It has been a process and there are for sure some do's and dont's for beginners.

I really had no idea what a pocket diaper was, or a hybrid, or even an all in one. The first kind I tried was a g-diaper. The concept is great and there are tons of people who love this style of diaper but I don't think it's a very good beginner cloth diaper. My husband hated the different steps of having to put new inserts in and pulling the old ones out and having to wrinse the shell if it got dirty or knowing if he should change the whole thing. I never had any issues with leaks but since our little girl is fairly tiny they always left snap marks on her hips and they always made me nervous that they would leak. So, we tried that but I was feeling discouraged. Then someone mentioned an all in one diaper and I thought... okay lets give that a try. I also wanted to make my hubbies life easier so he wouldn't be stressed so I bought 6 brand new bumgenious all in one type diapers off of craigslist. HE LOVED THEM! He said "Now this is a diaper I can handle!" The only thing was he said he would like to also try one with snaps. I held off though because I wanted him to get the hang of just dealing with one kind of diaper. Well, if you know anything about cloth diapers you are probably familiar with Kelly's Closet and they are constantly having amazing deals... like spend $25 dollars and get a free one size diaper. These are the kind of diapers that you can use from 10-30 or so pounds just by adjusting a series of snaps or elastic. So I signed up and bought two more all in one diapers and got a free fuzzibunz! This is a diaper with adjustable elastic AND it has snaps! oooooo ahhhhhh I loved it too! Then I started really researching types and kinds and I was amazed at all my options! It was insane. I always want to be as informed as possible which can kind of be a bad thing at times because I found I was so busy researching diaper types that I would be online for hours at a time! The world wide web is a dangerous thing. So now after a few weeks of true diaper searching I have come to a few conclusions. I love pocket diapers for the day as they are easy to clean and dry fast but all in ones are still my favorite for bedtime and the hubby of course. I really like one size diapers in general but have never diapered a new born and have heard that they are not the best option. I still really only have a modest stash of diapers but also have two flip covers (which are just regular waterproof diaper covers) and can use all of the cloth inserts I bought for my g diaper in those. Now I was on a roll. Or maybe a downward spiral into cloth diaper land but don't worry it all ends well. :) I am still excited about new diapers. I haven't done anything drastic or gone off the deep end. I do occasionally find myself thinking about them in my dreams.... an odd concept yes I know I blame it on how cute they make my little toot sweets tushie.

I still get a bit nervous when we are out and about... not sure why. I think its knowing that if she did go poo it's not as easy to clean in public but for the most part I am sold. Plus, now that I am getting the hang of it I will have it down by the time the next little tootie sweet comes along. I love that even though I have still spent $40 dollars a month for the past few months on diapers they are not diapers I have had to throw away. And as an added bonus my daughter can now fit into all her pants because her cute little fluffy booty is big enough to hold them up. :)

For more cloth diapering resources checkout

http://www.diaperpin.com/calculator/calculator.asp

www. cottonbabies.com

www.kellyscloset.com

www.youtube.com (so many great videos just type in cloth diapers)

www.diaperswappers.com- they have an online forum you can ask questions about ANYTHING even not cloth diaper related things like breast feeding, homeschooling, do it yourself projects and so on.)

Breast feeding success!!

Well, because I am a nurse practitioner and also happen to LOVE LOVE LOVE babies and mommies I often get questions about things like immunizations, birth control, childbirth, and today's topic, breastfeeding (BF). So I thought I would take a minute and give you a quick spin down on my thought for making your BF experience successful and hopefully some tips on how to have a healthy milk supply! Also, I personally did not find my lactation consultant very helpful so in those beginning 8-10 weeks I did a lot of research. Along with my best friend, who had her baby 12 weeks after I did, who also had a bit of a rocky start we read every book we could get our hands on. And between the two of us I think we experienced it all. Now this could encompass a lot but I am going to stick with the basics... how to make it work for you.

I never had given much thought to breast feeding before I had my daughter. Yes, I knew I would do it and yes I knew the basics but I had put so much thought and prayer into thinking about the delivery that it never occurred to me to prepare for breast feeding! I was so lost! It's amazing how much I knew about babies and childbirth and yet knew NOTHING about successful BF. I was clueless. Lucky for me my child was a natural and I had a bountiful supply however, I will also say it sure wasn't easy! Those first 8-10 weeks were tough. M

y lil tootie sweet (my daughter) had the tiniest mouth so I was constantly sore and the initial discomfort that was suppose to go away in a week lingered... and lingered... and lingered. Eventually, her little mouth got bigger and I discovered that I was having a reaction to the nursing pads that I was using and once I switched it was like night and day! Any way, here are my thoughts.

I think that in the wide world of mommies there is so much pressure to do this, or do that. I will start by saying that of course I think breast feeding best! It's the way God made it to be and I do believe it provides the best nourishment for baby and promotes the best times for bonding. HOWEVER!!!!, I will also say that just because you choose not to BF or if you cannot BF doesn't mean your a bad mommy or that your child is any less wonderful. As my best friend says, "By the time they get to kindergarten no one will be able to tell the difference." They will all have hair, teeth, and be able to walk and talk even if some took longer than others. The reasoning I am even brining this up is because I think that BF is very intimidating for some mommies and they give up before they even gave themselves a chance!

1. If you really want to breast feed you HAVE TO STICK WITH IT! Give it time. The post partum period can be stressful in and of itself but if you go based on those few days then 90% of mommies wouldn't breast feed at all. I say truly give it at least 8-12 weeks.

2. I think too many women supplement too early because they are nervous about their supply. By doing this you are actually hurting your supply on the front end. Some schedule for your own sanity is important but initially a baby should eat at least every 1-2 hours so you can establish a healthy supply. The more you put your baby to the breast the more you stimulate your body to make more milk. If you are supplementing with every feeding instead of just feeding more often you are hindering the cycle of supply and demand. I work in a hospital so I know how it goes when the nurse comes in and recommends that you supplement. They are nurses they should know right??? Yes, we are wonderful people but those first few days your baby really isn't eating to "fill up" any way they are there to help you create milk by stimulation. It's not really for a few days your milk supply even comes in. For me it took four days before my milk came in and it was ok! (granted I am not saying don't ever supplement but merely saying be careful not to jump the gun.) Of course your baby is rooting and is fussy when they do that NURSE EM!!!! Even if it's not on schedule or if it's every 30 minutes. That is how you create a wonderful and healthy supply!

3. Create a quiet environment when you are trying to nurse, free from people and well meaning visitors. It's ok to ask them to wait or even to leave because you are trying to BF because those first few days are critical. (I am attempting to avoid all the technical lingo as per my personality but will provide references and a link at the end for those of you who like that kind of stuff.) If you don't give yourself enough time or if you feel rushed then it is more likely you won't give that session enough time to really be beneficial. I know it's hard sometimes when you have other kiddos and even with family but for those first few days just ask for help. Get someone to be with your kiddos while you BF or put hubby in charge of talking with visitors in the waiting area until your done.

4. Can't stress it enough but DRINK, DRINK, DRINK!!! and then EAT, EAT, EAT! Seriously ladies you can lose the baby weight later. I had the hardest time remembering to eat because it felt like all I did was feed my baby only to have a ten minute potty break and then start all over. Now when I say eat... I mean good for your body eat not empty calorie eat. Get some healthy snacks prepared beforehand or have a list ready so after someone can pick up snacks you know you can remember to eat. String cheese, almonds, fruits, Lara Bars, whatever is easiest for you yet packs a punch in nutritional value. My new favorite thing is instead of making new mommies a meal is to bring them a munchie care package! Fill it full of heal

thy snacking options so they can quickly grab something.

5. Did I mention time??? Oh ya I think I did. Give yourself plenty of time to breastfeed without rushing your baby or yourself and don't call it quits at the 10 days mark. Give it a couple weeks before you decide. Seriously, at the end of the day some of the best moments I had with my little girl are those when it was just me and her in the middle of the night. Yes, sleep is amazing and yes daddy's are great at giving bottles and there is NOTHING wrong with that but I know I would trade any of those sleepless nights.

I know that so many people struggle with their supply and I truly believe it has to do with a lot of these issues. Stress, trying to put your baby on a schedule too fast, supplementing too quickly, or simply just not allowing your baby to feed as much as they should.

I am all for sleeping and schedules, trust me, I have read books on both sides of the fence but you need to create a balance and also allow your body to go through the supply demand cycle.

Well, I know this was brief and not very technicalbut there were my thoughts in a nutshell.

Some great resources are obviously the the Le Leche League (http://www.llli.org/). They also have a book is called "TheWomanly Art of Breastfeeding" While it is lengthy it is very helpful.

To be or not to be... that is the question.

A real blogger that is! Hmmmmmmmmmmmm

Ok.... so I am not good ol William but per the request of my dearest BFF and my hubby I have decided to actually start "blogging". Ha! SomethingI never thought I would do but here I am. I initially started so I could view others blogs but I guess I really do enjoy writing and even though I am not sure I have something important to say... I always have SOMETHING to say.

So here it goes folks.... a glimpse of me for starters.

My life isn't all that exciting... although there are days when I feel I have just stepped out of a scene from "Everybody Loves Raymond".... or the reality TV show featuring the Duggar family. I guess what I find very ordinary would probably not be all that ordinary to most people.

Why you ask? Well.....

For starters I work in an emergency department! There is nothing ordinary about that. It's not all that glamorous as seen on TV but let me tell you I have had my days! For the sake of those of you with queezy tummies I will spare you the details but somedays I am pretty sure I have just stepped out of the twilight zone. FOR REAL!

Secondly,

I come from a family of 14. Not the biggest family ever but not your average 2 per household family either. :) My ten youngest siblings are all adopted and the oldest four are what we call "bio-babies". I am among the oldest, although some would argue I am bossy enough to be the oldest. I have about as many cultures in my family as there are continents that provide them! I grew up thinking that rice was a staple with every meal. I married into a family that doesn't speak very much English and am constantly saying things in my head in two different languages. My poor child must think I am nuts. :)

I would probably describe my life as easy but constantly moving. More paint by number than connect the dots despite the fact that my personality is TOTALLY a connect the dots. I can roll with the punches but would at least like to know that they are coming. I love life. The ups, the downs, the highs and lows. I love how in each season of life there is always something that should (if we are paying attention) encourage us to cling to Jesus. I love, love, love being a wife and mother and through blogging hope to encourage other young mothers to embrace their journey in life towards His eternal Kingdom AND

their journey as moms and wives. Oh that we wouldn't waste our energy and time trying to wish away seasons or long for changes before their time but that we would embrace the sacredness of living each moment knowing that He is ever present. His grace is sufficient in all things and His goodness evident regardless of our circumstances. I desire to cling to His goodness each and every day as He is my source and daily bread. I can do nothing- wait- I am nothing outside of His constant goodness towards me. In my own strength I will accomplish nothing that will have lasting value but by leaning on His strength my actions can have an eternal impact.

I tend to be an all or nothing type of gal... I can also be very goal orientated. I like my ducks in a row, I like things to make sense, and I like knowing how I can take charge! Being a mom has taught me so much about my own weakness's and has humbled me in ways I didn't expect. I will never again judge another mother for her screaming child in Target, or the mother whose child is covered in some funky brown goo. I now say "Oh man, that will totally be me down the line". Why, HA! Because it will. All the things I thought I knew about being a mom and all my pre-conceived ideas are out the window. I am learning how to be gracious in the un-knowing. Gracious with my child and husband AND yes, even gracious with myself because Lord knows I need it. There is a time to follow the rules and there is a time to fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants. (As I am constantly learning) Never thought I would say that knowing my personality.

You know that saying "do your best and let God do the rest"? Cliche purhaps, but boy is it true. So for starters... and in closing by the grace of God this journey will end up revealing more of Him and less of me because all I can do is my best at leaning into Him and then letting him do the rest.

Jesus, would you give me eyes to see and ears to hear what it is that you are doing and saying in my life. That I would live each and every day with true convictions from the Holy Spirit and that in all things would bring glory to your name. Teach me to lean not on my own understanding but to cling always to your goodness as it is never failing.

Amen